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BONDING

A definition of bonding is “the establishment of a relationship or link with someone based on shared feelings, interests, or experiences.”  We can think of parents bonding with their children, siblings bonding, and many other human examples, such as sororities, fraternities, and even criminals and terrorists.


Animals also bond, and elephants are a wonderful example because of their intelligence, their long memories, and examples of their family bonds, which can include a herd of as many as 100 fellow elephants.


An animal species may also bond with a different one. Dogs and donkeys, elephants and horses, dogs and cats, and so on. If they are raised together, they will often bond.

Dogs are not only wonderful companions, they can also be trained as “seeing eyes” for people with visual problems. They have also been trained to respond to seizures in an owner, alert a person to low and high sugar levels, provide balance to someone walking, carry items, get help in emergencies, and so on. In such cases, they are indeed our “best friend.”


When we lived in Papua New Guinea and were at our administrative center, we once owned three animals: a dachshund, a Muscovy duck, and a tabby cat. They became good friends and would often lie in the sun together. I have a photo of the duck resting its head on the back of the dog, and the cat sleeping nearby.


We had named the duck Donald, of course, and he was quite a pet, as well as a “watch duck,” chasing stray dogs from the area.


One time some kids were at our house, playing in the backyard and one had to go under the house (it was on short posts) to retrieve a ball. He found a nest of eggs that “Donald” (who then was renamed Donna) had been laying. I told my agricultural friend about the find, and he said that the eggs were unfertilized so they would not hatch.

However, he had a solution and brought a half dozen fertilized hen’s eggs which we put in the duck’s nest.


The duck hatched the chicks, and we observed how they bonded with their mother, although Donna was puzzled when she saw them scratching at the ground. The young chickens followed Donna around but would not go out in the rain, which puzzled Donna even more. Nevertheless, the chickens and the duck bonded and believed they belonged to one another.


That is the way it is with bonding. There was a strong emotional attachment Donna had with the chicks because she hatched them, and they followed her around like little ducklings do. The bonding went on until the chicks were grown chickens, became more independent, and could fend for themselves.


Children bond most often with their parents and, if the parents are wise, they will teach their children what is right or wrong. Of course, the children can also learn to bond with delinquent peers who do not pay much attention to their parents.


Bonding can also refer to joining things by adhesive, heat, chemicals, or pressure. They are then secure and hard to pull apart. Intramolecular covalent bonding is the most difficult to break and hydrogen bonds prove to be the weakest.


We can also consider the metaphor of spiritual bonding. As Christians, we can bond with our Lord Jesus and we have a bonding agent as well, the Holy Spirit. The Agent is strong, but sometimes the substance, the individual, it adheres to is not. As depicted in The Pilgrim’s Regress by C.S. Lewis (Eerdmans’s Deluxe Edition, 1981), we wander from the road into the canyon and cause ourselves countless problems.


Nevertheless, God in his grace and mercy has the Holy Spirit convicting us and reminding us of sin so that we can resume our bond with Jesus. 


I learned a lot from observing Donna and her chicks. Although sometimes puzzled at their behavior, she never left them or decided she didn’t want them. My behavior must at times be puzzling to my Lord, but he never abandons me. His love is so strong and continuous that nothing can overcome it:


And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8.38-39, NLT).


What a wonderful bond!


Karl Franklin

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