ON BEING STUBBORN (3)

I have been writing about stubbornness because I know something about it. I have been stubborn, very much so, and at times when I have, it has been disturbing to others and out of the path of what God wants. 

At this point, we can pause and ask: What is so bad about being immovable (aka “stubborn”)? Don’t we want to be workers who are decisive, firm, inflexible, and resolute? Of course, in one sense, but coupled with these characteristics, God wants obedience, gentleness, pliability, a certain submissiveness, and someone who is teachable.

David acted contrary to God’s commands. He was determined in his compulsion to have Bathsheba. He was stubborn, and it led to adultery, murder, deceit, and, for some time,  life as a fugitive. Despite this, or because of his repentance, David became a man after God’s own heart. He eventually demonstrated the qualities that are opposite to stubbornness.

If a stubborn person is obstinate, refusing to budge, habitually determined to do his or her own thing, we learn that the opposite of stubbornness is to be docile, dutiful, obedient, pliable, submissive or teachable. 

Humility, of all the antonyms of stubbornness, seems to sum up the religious sense, where one ascribes to God and not himself all credit for life and purpose. The humble servant is compliant with God’s will and submissive to His purposes. The person is unpretentious and unostentatious; there is nothing to be showy about because life is one of obedience to God’s commands, which leads to peace with others. There is no need of pretension or assertion because God is in control, and the humble person can be subordinate to the wishes of God.

There are several components that are associated with the meaning of humility. These include obedience, in that a humble person yields to others and, in particular submissive to the will of God. Such people are also respectful, even in a sense subordinate, because they are not interested in improving their position. Like the person mentioned in James, one sits at the lowly position unless asked to sit at the table. Even then, it is done with humility, by showing deference to others, considering them as better than oneself.

Such a description may sound like a joke in our contemporary society. Here, our values promote self-aggrandizement, and the person who does not “look out for number one” (i.e. one ’s self) does not get ahead. The literal metaphor, in which we speak naturally of “getting ahead,” says it all: to be first in line, to have more toys than anybody else, to be recognized, to have privileges and favors: this is often the soul stuff of American life. Wherever a humble person lacks pretension and is unassuming, the natural American is in charge and boastful. The boasting is not always blatant, but in one way or another, we report on our tithes and offerings, our service and dedication, our righteous opinions, and our correct theology.

One characteristic of the humble man that is widely, although not often sought in our society is demonstrating peace, even quietness and patience. Contrast this with the assertive climber, who soon loses patience and has no peace of mind or family: marriages collapse like a house of cards, tempers flare on the freeway and in the home, impulses rule in sex and greed. On the other hand, humility is coupled with patience and compassion (Eph. 4:2), as well as honesty, kindness, and gentleness (Colossians 3:12). 

As indicated, the opposite of being stubborn, with pride and a refusal to obey God and follow His commands, is therefore humility. The stubbornness is in our spirit, heart, and mind, in short, it permeates our being such that we are unrepentant and obstinate. It is so pervasive that God wants to help us by humbling us. Only then can we see the need for change and pursue it.

Humble people therefore pursues peacefulness. They do not make bold, rigid, pretentious statements or issue challenges to others. They are not assertive but are convinced and content that God is controlling all events, including the position of humans in society and government in nations. With this perspective there is no need or desire to control others, but rather there is a desire to serve them.

For reasons known but to God Himself, He does not choose everyone to be Christians. In saying this we recognize that God desires all people to know Him and that He provides paths to Himself. But it is obvious that in some cases God goes much further: He marks some people as His own for special work. These Christians are called to a particular task, like Saul of Tarsus or Borden of Yale. They may have stubbornly resisting God up to a point, but He decided their destiny.

I am old now but am still trying to follow God in His working in my life. I pray that my stubbornness will yield to the peace and favor of the Holy Spirit. May it be so for all who follow Christ in their lives.

Karl Franklin